Guess that Ass

June 30, 2008

Ronaldo, widely recognized as the best player in the world, didn’t make the Euro 2008 all-star team or something like it. Now we know why, to busy keeping this lovely GTA girl happy. He’s been dating her since January, and it’s a role she clearly takes seriously, earlier this week she was spotted wearing a specially designed ‘R7′ logo diamond earring, in honour of her striker boyfriend.
Last year he dated our Wake UP With… jungle babe Gemma Atkinson, one super busy dude. No wonder he had nothing in the tank against the Germans!

Get this man Beer, cause’ he’s about to sing!

June 30, 2008

by Jon Dwyer…

I’ve always envied the crowd frenzy stirring in the stands at football (soccer) games. The only North American sport to rival the excitement at European and South American pitches is of a likened namesake…Football. If you go to a Philadelphia Eagles game it’s a distinct possibility that you may be punched in the face, robbed and/or generally humiliated unless you’re an Eagles fan, the same thing would happen if you went Anfield to watch your team play Liverpool.

What creates this kind of intimidation factor and general comradery amongst the likes of American Football and Soccer (Football) fans?

It’s the fucking songs!!!

Boys, we need songs!

Okay, I can hear the cries already,

-“There are no songs in NFL stadiums, and we’re quite happy about that”-

That’s true, but there is public drinking and tailgate BBQ’s! Drinking in public is outlawed in the City of Toronto (or so the drunk-tank attendant keeps telling me), so we need to take another approach. There is no way in the name of God (Jesus, Ala, you name him) that the City of Toronto, with its protestant ethic ingrained so deeply in public policies, that public drinking will ever become a legal reality. So, we’ll just have to carry on buying $11 beers in the Rogers Centre at Argos games and during the 6 Bills games were all nearly wetting ourselves in anticipation of.

But it’s not all lost on us; lets get some songs going boys!

Manchester United, my favourite Premiership squad, are known for their creative chants and taunts that rally not only the crowd, but the gents on the pitch as well (worked like a charm this year as the Red Devils took not only the Premiership title but the Champions League as well). Celtic and Liverpool supporters will “Never Walk Alone” while the Jordies in Newcastle possess a magical ability to express their devotion “to da lads” with a dialect yet to be deciphered by the most cunning linguist.

Sitting at my desk struggling with the idea of writing an Argos fight song, I hadn’t a bloody clue what to write. My creative poetic ability (at the moment) spans somewhere between Notorious BIG lyrics and something Bob Dylan said this morning; iPods will eventually rule us all. So, citing a lack of intelligence on my behalf I respectfully submit to the fans out there…

HIT US UP!!!

Write in a short fight song below that you think will rally Argos fans.

The following is a copy of the existing Argos fight song, honestly its garbage, can you do a better job?

Go Toronto Argos go go go
Pull together fight the foe foe foe
Scoring touchdowns for the blue on blue
The Argos will win for you

Full of Fight and Courage you cant stop
They’ll pile up points until they reach the top
Pull together till’ the grey cups won
Go Agros, Go Go Go

Come on people…